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Showing posts with label Contemplation. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Contemplation. Show all posts

Sunday, 6 September 2026

The Award : A Short Story

Vipraa came to know that Dr. Yashwant Patel – the well-known, veteran Gujarati writer-thinker-philosopher had received one of the highest Civilian Awards of the country. Wow !! Great !! Vipraa was acquainted to Dr. Patel. She had attended one of his lectures, more than three decades back and later got the opportunity to meet him. He was a renowned orator as well and Vipraa – a second year college student then, was impressed by his ability to hold the attention of his audience. How she had wished her professors would have at least a few percentage of that ability !! ….

The trail of other memories followed and she recalled her interactions with the renowned, as also controversial personality …. Yashwantbhai (that is what Dr. Yashwant Patel was addressed as) spoke with jesting nonchalance, with traces of pride in it – on all the opposition he was facing – all the letters that he was receiving against his writings ….

A Queer Comment ....

“Chhaayaa looks like a shelly cow ….” Yashwantbhai had commented about a common acquaintance, hearing which Vipraa was taken a back. The phrase “shelly cow” (called “vasuki gayeli gaay” in Gujarati) was new to Vipraa, but she could grasp the feel of what it meant. Later, she found out that it apparently means an old cow, usually in poor condition and found “useless” as she cannot be milked …. What Yashwantbhai said about Chhaayaa did not sound good at all. Not that Vipraa and Chhaayaa were great friends. Perhaps Yashwantbhai could know that they are too different to be friends. However, for some time, Vipraa and Chhaayaa were friends – if not good friends. At least that is what Vipraa thought. Chhaayaa was a professional and Vipraa was a college student then – more than three decades ago. They knew each other and had worked together for a couple of months, in a Youth Organization, to which Yashwantbhai was the mentor. Yashwantbhai, in his fifties then, enjoyed good influence on the founder of the Youth Organization, Rajiv, though behind his back, Rajiv openly and clearly expressed his reservations on Yashwantbhai’s “limitations” that Vipraa found difficult to understand. Rajiv was under some stress, perhaps, to maintain his hold on his group members. There were questions being raised on the vision and objectives as well as on the ways of functioning of the organization. Vipraa, a teenager at that time, could sense that there was something wrong somewhere and tried to see if there could be a change for good …. It couldn’t work. Perhaps she was too small, too simple, too naive …. Whatever !! Vipraa was sure of what she thought was right and good for herself. She distanced herself from the organization and its hassles, wishing and praying for the good of All …. Chhaayaa was close to Rajiv and perhaps had gone closer than what could be expected of a decent relationship …. Vipraa wondered as to how that was possible ??!! And if they are so close, why do they not get married ??!! ….

I am an anti-marriage person ….

And Yashwantbhai – he is known for his views against marriage. He himself told Vipraa that he is against marriage – “I am an anti-marriage person ….” Much later, Vipraa came to know that he had even initiated a campaign against marriage … !! ?? What for ? He himself is happily married !! His kids also got married later !! And as far as can be known – they are quite happy !! Still he spoke with such confidence and pride that he is anti-marriage – against marriage !! Why ??!! This is where Vipraa could not agree with Yashwantbhai. She never spoke to him about it directly. She treated Yashwantbhai with great respect – as a good writer and orator and an elderly renowned personality ….

How and why does such a great thinker and writer take pride in speaking against, even running a campaign against marriage – a relationship that is the basis of a healthy family life in a healthy, strong society …. !!??

Did he not give a thought to the option of understanding and talking about the essence of, the importance of, the dignity of that relationship …. Does he not owe anything of his achievements to his parents and their relationship; to his family life, to his marriage and to his wife …. ??!! ….

Before turning against any tradition, especially publicly, is it not wise to understand what it stands for, what are the misconceptions prevailing about it and how they can be overcome, to ensure that the essential auspicious thought and conviction behind its evolution are upheld …. ??!!

In a lighter vein, Vipraa observed that the fashion of running away from marriage and blaming marriage has never got old among men for ages !!

Feminism .... ??!!

Some other aspects of Yashwantbhai’s views also puzzled Vipraa. While speaking to Vipraa during their telephonic conversations on the Raamaayana and his own writings on the great scripture, Yashwantbhai more than once emphasized on focusing on the characters of Taadakaa and Shoorpanakhaa – the two Rakshashis or demonesses – saying they turned bad due to the atrocities they faced and due to curses of sages …. Vipraa felt puzzled when she heard that for the first time and more so on its repetition for the second time …. Then, the next time, she gave her reply to the advice – “It is better to focus on Shabari.” (In Raamaayana, Shabari is a tribal lady, an ardent devotee of Lord Raama and a disciple of the great Sage Matanga, who tells Lord Raama about Hanumanji and where he can be located).

Yashwantbhai had written in one of his articles that Shoorpanakhaa had done nothing wrong by flirting with Raama and Laxamana and that she should not have been punished for doing so …. was she punished for “flirting” with Raama and Lakshamana or for trying to harm Sitaa ? Vipraa had asked about this, but she did not get any reply ….

Well, is such a stance – of favouring vamp-like characters – called feminism ? Or is that being kind to ladies ? What type of feminism is it – women have the right to be wrong and bad ??!! ….


Vipraa found Yashwantbhai cautioning her against various evils prevailing in the society, especially against women, many of which were undoubtedly genuine – but he never talked of solutions, or efforts / attempts being made towards seeking the right solutions or attempts being made towards overcoming them. He sounded neither optimistic nor solution-oriented, in spite of his known associations with social works and social reforms. Was he so much taken to the awe of magnitude and complexities of the problems that he had lost sight and track of solutions …. ?

In a couple of bouts of credulity that Vipraa had witnessed during his lecture sessions, Yashwantbhai showed tendencies of trusting and committing on behalf of those who were not true enough to him – from what they spoke of him behind his back. And perhaps, as a lame excuse to the consequences of such blunders, he sometimes posed off that he enjoys being misunderstood …. Vipraa wondered if Yashwantbhai could see that his gracious servings of hot and sour spicy grey stuff to fans suffering from hyper acidity could be harmful to their health as well as his reputation.

In view of all this, Vipraa had her own doubts and concerns about how much and what type of justice Yashwantbhai was doing to all the appreciation, the respect and name he was commending in the society ….

Life takes its own course and amidst challenges of striking a balance between circumstances and priorities, acquaintance with Yashwantbhai turned into memories of appreciation and lessons from his lectures and writings and some interactions with him.

And of course, there can be no denying to the fact that Yashwantbhai speaks and writes well on a good range of topics – that include philosophy, religion, politics, nature and so on, with some traces of spiritualism …. and is much appreciated ….

A beautiful quote from Khalil Gibran brought Vipraa back to her present :

“I have learned silence from the talkative, toleration from the intolerant, and kindness from the unkind; yet strange, I am ungrateful to these teachers.”

With prayers in her heart, Vipraa got back to her work.


- Vanita Thakkar (26th August, 2020)

© 2020 Vanita Thakkar

Sunday, 7 June 2026

Expectations - Poem .... With Reflections on - Is It Possible to Be Devoid of Expectations ?! How to Balance Them ?!

 

.... Everything does not happen just as we expect .... Is it possible to be devoid of expectations ??!!



Expectations


Time goes on and on.

The future, absolutely unknown.

And ambitious as he is,

Man always expects bliss.


Joy, to the present they nurture,

These lovely dreams of future.

But, alas ! It is a fact that

Everything does not happen just as we expect.


- Vanita Thakkar (29.06.1987)


29th June, 1987 was the day on which my Secondary School Board Examination (commonly known as Class X Board Examination) results were declared. I had topped in my school - among all those who had appeared for Board Examinations : Secondary as well as Higher Secondary, but, had scored lesser than expected. My scoring percentage had never gone below 80% throughout my schooling and I saw myself scoring an unexpectedly low 76% and was dejected. We (my teachers, family, friends, relatives, well-wishers .... and I) had expected much higher marks and percentage.

I was a student of Gujarat Secondary Education Board (GSEB) and for Standard / Grade X, the Examinations are conducted centrally by the respective state education boards, as per the prevailing education system in India. I had been a student of Central Board (managed by the Central Government Education Department) till the previous year, that is, till my 9th standard / grade. In the Central Board schools, there is an internal board examination in the 9th standard, which means the question papers for the examinations are from the Central Board - sent to schools all over India, but the assessment takes place locally. After completing my 9th standard, my parents decided to shift me to a state board school as that would ensure easier and better scopes for university admissions in Gujarat. There are limited seats for Central Board students in the state run universities and higher studies in Vadodara was a top preference for both, my brother and me.

Education - with respect to contents, style as well as atmosphere - in state board schools was very different. Taking extra coaching in the form of tuitions outside the school was so common that I was the only student in my class - both sections - who had not opted for any external coaching. There were optional subjects to be selected - I opted for Hindi instead of my mother-tongue Gujarati since I had never had any formal education in Gujarati. There was a choice of two out of three between Sanskrit, Special Geography and Typewriting and I wanted to take Sanskrit and Special Geography, but both classes were going on simultaneously. So, I took Sanskrit and Typewriting. For typewriting, we had to go to a separate affiliated institute for a session of one hour after our school hours, every working day. I had scored well and highest in both of those subjects. The problem was in Science, Mathematics and English. I was complimented (and unknowingly consoled) that scoring this good percentage in English medium was commendable. In Gujarat State Board, English medium results were always lower and poorer than Gujarati medium results. The common reason that I got to hear from most people was that the English medium paper assessment was too difficult for the available qualified staff. Some people even told me that my cursive (and pretty good) handwriting (that was much loved and appreciated by all, especially my teachers - so far) must have been too difficult to read (that is something very disappointing) !!

This poem and my parents were the only ones who knew how disappointed I had felt at my result. No, no, there was one more person (Ha, Ha ....) : My father had accompanied me to my school for collecting my result. I tried and managed to remain cool while accepting all the compliments and Pappa was cheering me up on our way back as we boarded an auto rickshaw. He was happy and wanted to celebrate. He asked the auto rickshaw driver to stop near a sweet shop and got down to get the sweets. I realized how sullen my face had turned, when a genuinely concerned auto rickshaw driver asked me, "Beta (an affectionate way of addressing a kid or younger one), have you failed ?" Oh God !! .... "No", I replied, "I have passed ...." as I saw my smiling father return back with a packet of sweets and board the auto rickshaw ....

I had written this poem in the quietness of the evening that day, sitting all by myself in our little backyard and decided that I will score higher - at least, not let my results go further down - in the two years of schooling left before me. I could manage that and I topped in the next two years as well, even though in my Higher Secondary Examination also, I scored much lesser than expected in one of the main subjects - Chemistry and could not cross the 80% mark.

My certificates for the SSCE ...




 

Further Reflections on Expectations ....

Expectations are often mentioned at several places - in philosophy, in religion, in relations ....

My experience in the above mentioned incident was with reference to expectations of results of my efforts in studies. Till the above incident took place, my results used to be better than what I would expect. I would estimate how much I was likely to score, and I would never get lesser than what I would expect. Also, here, even though the results were not up to the expectations, and perhaps up to the caliber, they were not altogether bad. My friends would not understand my dismay, which would surface out spontaneously, as they had a very different background. And I was scoring more than them !! So, some even looked upon it as my "hypocrisy" !!

The study material that we got in State Board schools was also not as good as I was used to. Text books were most disappointing .... Making notes, going to the library, reading reference books .... was something that did not appeal to most of my new class mates. In Secondary School, I was the only student who went to the library regularly - much to the joy of my teachers and librarian. In Higher Secondary, our English Medium library was never found open !! And perhaps I was the one who was most disappointed about it .... But, this was not all. Studies went on in their own course. I was in Science stream and there were hardly ten or eleven girls in our class. Our group of seven girls was most amazing. We had had some most memorable wonderful times together and the seven of us are still in touch ....

People try to philosophize expectations by saying - "All troubles are due to expectations .... There should be no expectations ...."

How true is it ? Is it not OK to expect a human being to behave like a human being - as the most beautiful of creations ? And is it really possible to stop expecting ? Is life so isolated ? Are our ethical rulings, religious preaching and legal systems not based on expectations - to maintain order and peace in human society ?

Expecting someone to stop expecting is in itself an expectation !! (Ha, Ha ....)

Perhaps we forget a very important fact of Life - there is no independence in physical, emotional and social ecosystems. There is interdependence, which has to be respectfully and lovingly enjoyed. And that leads to "independence" - a word that belongs to the world of spiritualism.

The problem, perhaps, is not related to expectations being there or not, as expectations cannot be ruled out. They cannot be non-existent. However, a balance of expectations has to be established and maintained in our relationships and dealings everywhere - in personal, professional and social lives as well as in our relationships and dealings with our surroundings, our environment, our ecosystem and our beautiful universe, as a whole. This is a collective responsibility, wherein everyone, every individual plays his / her significant role.

Some interesting and thought-provoking quotes on - Expectations ....

 







From HubPages .... Published on 01st December, 2020.

© 2020 Vanita Thakkar

 

Thursday, 28 May 2026

Perfection - a Poem .... What Is It ? an Aspiration, a Quest, an Expectation … a Tool, a Weapon ... Let Us Explore ....

 



Perfection


Perfection – unattainable :

A guiding star

To students, artists,

Continuously inspiring

Them for improvement;

A source of humility

For the Enlightened,

Saving them from

The vices of blindening ego.


Perfection – unattainable :

A tool and a weapon.


Perfection – unattainable :

But, measurable ?!

By man –

Whose perfection lies

In being imperfect ?!


Perfection – the Creator’s Nature :

Dissolve in its infinity

Through surrender.


- Vanita Thakkar (12.09.2008)



 

Perfection : an aspiration, a quest, an expectation ....

Perfection : tool - to chip and chop, crave and carve ....

Perfection : a weapon - to shake and break - individualities and identities .... ??!!

- Vanita Thakkar

 



© 2008 Vanita Thakkar

 

Tuesday, 19 May 2026

Camouflaged Trust - Poem

 



Trust overladen with hidden, blind expectations creates unwanted and undue stresses and strains. Such experiences expose parasitic tendencies in relationships, in which the contributor gets exposed to the risk of being consumed by the receiver and has to be careful. A pure, determined mind can help with the confidence required to overcome and overpower such difficulties.

- Vanita Thakkar (22-02-2021)

 

Camouflaged Trust


What is it

That comes along

Camouflaged as trust

And claimed broken ?

Appreciation,

Which keeps turning upside down ?

Or peeping curiosity

Soaked in sore patience,

Seeking answers

That lie within ?

Or cleverness

Often mirror-imposed in fox

For its scavengerly habits ?

Or all these together

And much more

Unknown to my ignorant awareness,

Turning me into a protagonist

In a farce of converting

Disguised, disastrous expectations

Into challenges,

Too overbearing for my frail being,

But for the unfailing grace of

That Omnipresent Nobody.


- Vanita Thakkar (03.04.2011)

Monday, 18 May 2026

Consolations - Poem

Plight Of Womanhood .... Continued Refusal To Learn From Past, To Change For Good ....How Long, How Far .... ??!!



CONSOLATIONS

“Well, well, dear !!

This world didn’t spare

The divine Sita,

Purity embodied

And the dazzling Draupadi,

Blazing Womanhood,

Who are you and I ? ….”

Thus go consolations,

Sometimes soothing,

While at times piercing

The perpetually bleeding

Sores of Time,

Wailing wordlessly

At stagnated sensitivity

And vicious wiliness,

Regressing Manliness.


- Vanita Thakkar (17-03-2015)


We often hear such gratifications / consolations when there are talks about injustice to women ....

Sometimes, they are also used to caution / discourage a successful lady, steadily progressing on her chosen path, urging her to be "satisfied" with her share of achievements .... The reasons behind such discouragements can be very many that may even be too difficult to decipher immediately, but there is a clear, definite oversight to the sense of duty, commitment or necessity that prompts the lady to work towards perfection / excellence and resulting success ....

Plight Of Womanhood ....

Continued Refusal To Learn From Past,

To Change For Good ....

How Long, How Far .... ??!!


The Plight Of Sita .... ".... Prove Yourself ...."


Draupadi's Ordeal .... The Worst Insult Of Womanhood Right In Front Of Elders And Distinguished, Respected Courtiers ....

 

© 2020 Vanita Thakkar

THE QUEST : Some Thoughtlets, Thought Waves ....

Perceptions Steer Relationships - In Professional As Well As Personal Life .... Clarity; Focus On Merits, Principles And Objectives Of Common, Higher Interests Is Essential ....

Perceptions Steer Relationships - In Professional As Well As Personal Life .... Clarity And Focus On Merits, Principles And Objectives Of Common, Higher Interests Is Essential ....

- Vanita Thakkar (29-07-2020)

The Quest ....

Whatever I see of you in you

Is but an image of myself,

Because even though my eyes look outwards,

I am continuously searching myself all round.


Short-comings of the other person

As seen by me –

They may be my beliefs

Or may be a proof of my short-sightedness.


How to know that

Someone is proud, jealous .... ?

It may be our doubt.


What is the need of judging others ?

Why bother about others’ short-comings ?


From all that I have seen of myself and others,

Judgments have more to do with the person who judges

Than with the person who is being judged.


Sometimes, the shortcomings or drawbacks

Which we think others have

Are the reflections of

Our own drawbacks in them.


So, whenever, one feels that

The other person lacks so and so,

Instead of worrying about that person,

One should check one’s own self first.


- Vanita Thakkar (04-06-1991 - from my old diary)

Superimposition of one's own fault on someone else to justify one's possessiveness to one's preferences, is an example of one of the "Klesha"s (afflictions) described in the Patanjal Yoga Sutra (classical text on Yoga by Sage Patanjali), which creates havoc in administrative systems as well as relationships ....

In administrative systems, focus on Merits and Principles is essential and in relationships, Love is the essence.

- Vanita Thakkar (21-08-2017)

Life begins as a quest of the child for the man, and ends as a journey by the man to rediscover the child.

- Sam Ewing.

The real reason for a quest is always self-knowledge.

- Thomas C. Foster

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